so i got myself into a bit of trouble last nite. im not even sure whats going to happen now, its a weekend so whatevers gonna happen isnt gonna happen till next week. i just wish i had been more careful, i really dont have ne1 else to blame but myself but im just thinking there were just so many ways that this could have been avoided. i hate how i got other people involved too. now i dont know what to do; i just keep thinking about it and well it doesnt really help to think about something when you cant fix it or make it better. waiting....

finally done with all my tests for the week. went to my CSD test; the one thats 90% airheads, geeez it took them 15 min to pass out scantrons and another 15 to pass out tests. the directions seemed easy enough but these morons just kept asking the same stupid questions over and over again, its like they never taken a test before. you just gotta wonder sometimes how the hell these people manage to not kill themselves.

Which Peanuts Character Are You?

this week seems to have gone by really fast, its thursday already. went tot he CTSA meeting today im not really sure if i wanna join or not, it'll be another $20, i ve laready decided that im not gonna do Red cross or ACC cuz well ACC has there meetings too early i like my afternoon naps and Red cross well i joined last year even paid my dues yet we didn't do anything. thry had more officers then members last year but this year i admit it does seem more organized but their meetings are at 5:30 again that will probably cut into my precious nap time. you see my nap time is very dear to me i cant concentrate without one, or maybe i should just try sleeping earlier instead of blogging and reading horoscpes at 2 in the morning. speaking of horoscopes i think the profiles of each sign are actually quite accurate, or it could just be another one of those self-fulfiling prophecies, like if you tell someone enough times tat they are stupid soon they'll actually start acting stupid even if they really arent, or if you goto a psychic and they tell you ur gonna marry a girl thats 5'6 and 110 lbs so now you only date girls that match that description, yea those are all self-fulfilling prophecies. but its weird both the profile for the chinese zodiac and the astrological zodiac seem to be very similar to my personality, or it could just be that these profiles tend to only discuss the positives and are sufficiently vague, hence since we like to think of ourselves as respectable individuals we try to find these positive attributes they desscribe in our own lives. though i do admit one negative is that am stubborn at times but of course i suppose everyone has had a bout of stubborness before.

i just realized that i have three tests and a paper due next week all on either monday or tuesday. this weekend is gonna be all work work work. rite, probably just gonna procrastinate till sunday. i don't even know what to write about for my AAS paper, it has to fill up five pages. hmmm...i have three topics in mind (1) the melting pot versus salad-bowl ideaological debate: a critique on cultural assimilation, (2) a discussion on how culture is embeded within language and a nescessity for cultural transmission, (3) a critical anaylsis of asian-american activism in american society. i just don't know if i can fill the page requirement on any of these topics. any suggestions??

got a belated birthday gift today! :-D

meditation is good, unfortunately no time...

ARGHH...i just hate my life sooo much sometimes, it seems recently im just running into some really terrible luck. NOTHING seems to be going the way i want it to, im PISSED OFF and im not even sure if its even worth being pissed about. it feels as if god is some how plotting against me and im not even sure what ive done to deserve this. chances are its really juss the paranoia building up in my head. i juss need a good friend to talk to but well people are busy. most of my friends here i dont really know that well and i have a hard time getting to know them better cuz, be told, they arent much sharers themselves. its alot easier to open up to others if they also open up to you. i know im overreacting i need some time to think things out, but thats the problem i either have too much time and i over think or i dont have enough and things just jumble up.

thai noodles, the comedy club and cake were really awesome, thanks again!

overreacting again.....take a deep breath.

its my birthday today. i was hoping to go out tonight and having some fun with some friends on campus but well things just dont seem to go as i planned. something at the last second always pops up and ends up messing up my ideal day. these things are out of my control you cant prepare for it or for that matter prevent it. and no1 is to blame. its not like i could say HA its all your fault. just bad luck, i suppose. sooooo, its my birthday and im doing laundry, i feel like crap. but i am going to be going to a comedy club tomorrow night, that should be pretty awesome. ive heard that thier acts are actually really funny. i tried to invite some other people to the show, people that i wanted to hang out with tonight but well they didnt seem to be too interested. im not sure how i feel about that, i mean it is for my birthday, selfish as that might sound, if you dont have anything else important planned and your invited to come why not come? but then again if you force people to goto something they have no interest in well lets just say you shouldnt waste their time or their money since it does cost money. anyhow,im looking forward to tomorrow nite! and thanks to all my friends who orginally invited me to the comedy club for my birthday. thanks so much!

chinese is way too time consuming. ive already spent over five hours on all this homework and im not even sure im done. i still cant recongnize a bunch of the characters let alone know how to write them, i guess this is what you get for taking a class worth six hours, 2/5 of all your hours. on top of all that im not sure whats going on in my other classes...

last nite was pretty spiffy. went with some friends to another friends place. chilled and had some drinks. i say there is nothing wrong with a guy liking girly drinks. who says smironolf and skyy are "girly" anyways. we made a decent pina colada though we didnt have enuff rum and ran out of ice but still it turned out pretty good. its true alcohol does make everything taste better! neways, i have a relatively low tolerance so it doesnt take much to get me tipsy. by the end i still knew my name, where i lived, and i could still walk straight so i guess i wasnt wasted but then again i wasnt exactly sober either. drinking is okay just as long as its in moderation and you know your limits. the US is still one of the only industrialized nations that has 21 as a legal drinking age. FRIDAY IS MY BIRTHDAY i'll be 20...just one more year till im legal. i feel so old. nothing seems to happen at 20. its juss a year closer to dying isnt that a terrible thought..geeez.

decided to got absa tonight. pretty fun met alot of new people, like i expected i didnt do that well at bowling but the food was really good. unfortunately the fun was cut short due to some idiot setting off the fire alarm. yea, and i won a shirt. gonna join this organization for sure never really knew why i stopped coming to the meetings last year i think it conflicted with another club. neways i was thinking about also joining ctsa too, chinese taiwanese student association but last year i seemed outta place with csa, chinese student association, so i stopped going, they were mostly, hate to use the term, but FOBs. hopefully, ill know and meet more people i can relate with this year at ctsa.

three different organizations are all having events tomorrow nite at relatively the same time. i didnt join enough clubs last year but now i think im goin overboard this year. In addition, all my clubs seem to be asian i need something that doesnt have asian or an asian country in its name. Red Cross? Mock Trail? Cooking Works? yes i do need to learn how to cook cant eat burgers and sandwhiches the rest of my life. but ive heard that this cooking club is just a bunch of ppl who cant cook getting together and trying to figure out how to make sumthing, hmmmmm....

be safe people, be safe.

well i guess u cant dwell on the past all you can do is try to learn from everything and make the future better. what i do know now is that it aint closed in fact its very much open and well you shouldnt rely one source.

gawwwwd, im just so pissed off about something right now!
This is just soooo much bull shit; sometimes you gotta wonder what the fuck?
arrrgh...annoyed...pissed.....this is so stupid too. damn it!
im made to feel like all this crap is ALL my fault some how and i believed it,
but now i dont...

sorry i havent been blogging lately its been hectic since school started. for those of you who actually read my blog ill write about it later, promise.